Development is not straight! (line)
Imagine yourself walking the road...
The road is straight and there is nothing extraordinary on the way…
you walk and on both sides is just a lake, and the path, a forest, the weather is quite lovely...
What do you challenge in yourself on such a road?
Now imagine yourself walking this road and on this road you see a door...
you enter it even though you don’t know where it is going to take you...
you open it, you see the light, you make the first step.
You walk, then you see the lake with flowers and butterflies.
Then you walk again, and you have to choose one road from 2 possible... you select the right.
You walk, and you come back to the same place, so you decide to go left.
You walk, then you climb and then you go down again.
It's cold, getting dark, it's getting scary, you hear some noises from your past... and of your fears.
You face them - even though you are afraid you, do not stop - you breathe.
When you are ready you walk again, you see the light...
By walking the same road, taking always the safest way you will not ignite change that much.
Changes in your belief system, your behaviors and in your skills.
Still, it is your choice.
You may take the easy way.
Life will catch you anyway on the shortcuts...
I believe that what must be questioned in your life will be challenged anyway.
Most people, when these challenges come... they don't see it as a chance for change and for personal growth.
They see it as a big problem. They are scared to overcome it.
So very often, they turn back to the old life's habits and way of living.
Albert Einstein once said:
Nothing changes if nothing changes.
Development is not a straight line.
Our lives are not like the first (nice&easy) path all the time.
There are hills and dark forests too.
There are blind valleys, cold waters, and burns from the beautiful sun.
That’s how humans evolve.
It is complex.
Like walking up the stairs, at least three dimensions climbing, and sometimes we stop, sometimes we fall.
Sometimes we go straight forward, and we are surprised by finding ourselves in the same place.
And it's all good. That’s the way it is.
The Art of Development
'The difference between neurotic and artist is that the artist takes a word and gives it back as creation. The neurotic just takes it and chokes her/himself… '
It’s a great quote. Unfortunately, I don’t know who wrote it. I heard it somewhere a while ago and remembered it well.
It seems to be very true.
(oh… it's so great to feel it, oh I am so spiritual, oh I discovered that or that … )
Great that you did it.
Now the thing is to understand that...
Yes, awareness requires action, a practical implementation of your discoveries.
What will you do with your findings?
How will you use them in daily life?
I am not saying that you should go straight into doing mode when you discover something, there are people who need to be in something for a while to realize it more and more.
Sometimes it is also okay not to do anything.
But... while I was working with coaches (and people responsible for development) I saw a pattern that people in this space often finish the first, second, third course and they do not implement genuinely what they learned.
If you are lucky, it will bring you back to the starting point
You cannot cheat the game of your own life.
You are the only one who may see it and face it.
You are the only one living it.
In other words... many people swim on the surface of development...
...and many coaches surf with them.
Choose to Dive in Deeper.
If you are someone who helps others to develop, it's essential that you are aware of all of that and you see development as the artist sees their work.
You work with the human soul, and the human soul is not stable and compact.
It is more the essence of everything the person lived through.
The Best Development Tool.
Even though I have finished a lot of professional, deep, holistic courses and attended lots of workshops and more... (yeeeep development masturbation! But no worries it was a long time ago;).
I grew as a human being the most, after having my son and then during the process of separation/divorcing (even though it was me who made a decision of ending the marriage, still it took altogether 3 years of intensive realization and hard work with myself to get to the place of being 'at peace' with myself ).
That was a real, deep, sometimes shitty and sometimes very spiritual development (with lots of hits and pain next to many insights and actions).
So look back and see these challenging times in your life and ask yourself:
Where was your moment of truth?
When did you feel the strongest development?
What did you do with your discoveries (insight)?
There you go…
Being Responsible for your Own Growth.
Did you do something or perhaps you prefer to blame your childhood (parents, school, husband, wife, work, you name it…) for who you are, and for where you are right now?
Still, after 20 or more years later?
You live now. You may change something now. You may broaden your perspective. You may forgive them and yourself. You may let go. You may accept your 'now' and the whole life path which brought you to this moment. There are options.
Accept your past with all the ups and downs even if those downs were very harmful and painful, because you learned. With every hit with every fall, you changed.
Align with your own life development, with your growth, uplift yourself.
Self-awareness and being conscious leads to a responsibility to DO something with what is coming, with what you see.
You may need some help. It doesn’t hurt that much to meet with a specialist once a while.
Be curious. Read a Good Book. See Differently.
Remember there is no better tool for self-development then a LIFE itself.